I don't know if this is at all an option, or if it would give you enough space, either - but if she did visit, could you pay for her to stay in a hotel? When the mother comes to visit here, she stays with friends instead of with me. This relieves so much of the stress because it means I have alone time and space to regroup. Another idea is taking a weekend or long weekend away somewhere with her if it would help not having her in your space.

I hear having no visit would be preferable - these are just some ideas that might help if she did visit. They would help me, anyway.