I should title this post: Murphy's Law because that's the tone of how the entire day went from the moment I woke up to the present time (now).

This morning, I left 30 minutes earlier than I needed to, so that I could drive around the downtown area near my new work building's location, to try to find $7-8/hr parking. I totally misread a parking ramp sign for the ramp in my work building, and found out when I left work, that I owed $26.00 for parking in the ramp...b/c that is the ramp's daily rate (if you can believe it) and they offer $7/hr parking after 4 p.m. Clearly, I need a new prescription for my eyeglasses.

This company doesn't reimburse their employee's parking. Nice, huh?!

I was hired to believe this was a front desk/admin position. NOPE, nopeety, nope, nope. It IS a front-desk position but 90% of it deals with UPS and USPS mail and packages. Now, if I wanted to work in a mail room full-time, I would have applied for THAT job. I was misled in both of my interviews by the COO and front desk person to believe that this would be a senior receptionist position with administrative duties. Not.Even.Close.

Sure, it still pays more than $15/hr BUT ITS A HORRIBLE JOB.

The president of this company is so OCD, that he frequently walks around the office to correct his employees on how clean their cubicle areas are. He also demands that each conference room be sprayed down between clients, chair heights kept low and pushed in straight across from each other. If you have power cords from your computer sticking out underneath your cubicle HE YELLS that it makes the entire office look tacky.

The front desk person training me, got promoted after working there 2 years already (she's 23; I'm 48, so I already feel like a total loser). She warned me that if I didn't overspray the conference room tables with glass cleaner between meetings, push power cords back underneath the front desk, dust the lobby furniture multiple times daily that he would become irate and probably fire me.

You just can't make this stuff up.

Today, the large conference room was used 4 times. I'm pretty sure I inhaled toxic glass cleaner for 8 hours straight today and will probably develop black lung because of it. The 23 year old whose job I'm taking over, wrote up a few pages of instructions but she kept yelling at me that I wasn't doing anything right.

Um, it's my first day. What the hell do you expect?

Also, the hours are 8 to 5 p.m. with a 60 minute lunch but no morning or afternoon 15 minute break WHICH IS TOTALLY ILLEGAL btw!! Do you think I'm going to complain to the COO about this? Nopeety, nope, nope. I decided I am just going to take 15 minutes in the morning and afternoon ANYWAY and use the excuse that I was delivering mail "upstairs" to their other floor.

Also, very spartan place probably because it's a life insurance company. They want the place to be so devoid of LIFE that you mistake it for a mortuary. No plants allowed, no public talk radio allowed.

I think I'm going to die. But I don't want to buy their life insurance.

And, because of my age, their health insurance premium is the same as a car payment. I checked my county health insurance programs for income based eligibility and a single household can't make more than $24,000 or they are ineligible. So, I make more than that at this place, and thus, am ineligible for a lower monthly premium. I called around some health insurance companies and was quoted monthly premiums in the $330-$500 a month range.

I have until Nov 1st to choose their health insurance or go without. I'm considering going without ANY health insurance just to save money. I am in grad school but already have accrued student loans, so once I finish next year, if I'm still employed at this place, my income based repayments will be as high if not more, than a car payment. The alternative: pay-off my car that I owe $3500 on, and get rid of that monthly car payment. What choice do I have?

My biggest gripe is that this job will inevitably kill my spirit. I know that the 23 year old survived it b/c she's young and so she didn't have the age bias to deal with, like I do being 48 years old. If I stay at this mortuary, I mean, life insurance company, I will suffer psychologically from the sparse, toxic, work environment.

My resume reads like a 3-hole punch as I have spent the past 28 years effing up with job-choice, and failing to land jobs that are applicable to my interests and skill set. Job hopper galore...but not by choice, by circumstance. Can't erase history even though I can reformat it on my resume, but recruiters hate the 'functional format' resume.

How the hell am I going to get out of this cycle of bad job after bad job. I need this job's income for at least 2-3 years so I can support myself. I don't know if this is a rant post, as much as it's a reaching out to everyone to ask for advice when you are stuck like I am. I only have myself to blame. So, you don't need to beat me up about my past job choices. I've been doing that since I got home today. I really don't know how I am going to survive this job. It's toxic to my well-being.