Dear T: I know I need to tell you how serious the suicidal thoughts are.
It's definitely a sign that things are progressing in my head action wise. I think you will down play it like you normally do because I am still functioning. I am still going to work. Even though I want to call out every single day. I am still doing my work while at work. I am still doing what I have to do, showering, cooking, etc. But that doesn't mean I'm not suffering tremendously. It doesn't mean I'm not serious. It doesn't mean I haven't formulated a plan. Just because I am doing what I have to do to survive, doesn't mean I will ultimately survive myself. Kit