Oh, I believe you - you would have to be incredibly imaginative to make this up. And I'm about to pour my heart out to you. I always have trouble knowing what to say when people are not understanding the potential damage having a relationship (exploitative) with their therapist, because I know I didn't listen when a therapist friend tried to warn me. My words- "What can it hurt to try?" It hurt so much, so many parts of my life. My family, my livelihood, my ability to concentrate or to trust my own decisions. It has been 7 years since I moved out of her home, and I'm still triggered by questions like yours, because I want so much to spare anyone the hurt I have gone through. I went into therapy hoping to be coached through a life crisis. I'm hearing many similarities between your description and my experience. One week I could have sworn she was flirting - the next week very deliberately showing off a ring and hinting about a relationship as if she was warning me off. Later, she told me that she was going home every night to a pillow she'd named after me, from the very beginning of therapy. I think if you went to the psychotherapy forum and found the thread for survivors of unethical therapy, you would see that most of us started off being groomed, with a push, pull at the beginning until it was clear that we were hooked. That's very much what I'm hearing in your post. Your therapist has actually stopped being careful about she says to you. Please be careful. Listening to a therapist talk through your session is unlikely to be therapeutic. I don't think I can say be careful too many times. Notice everything and if something is confusing, ask questions. I let so many things go by, always giving her the benefit of the doubt. Later I have found that she spun a carefully crafted web of lies. The good news is that you are asking for input. I'm not sure I would have been open to it.
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