Thank you for the replies @TishaBuv @Kathleen83 and @Maranara

I do feel that at least a few of the traits listed in the DSM-5 apply to me, but I have also watched many videos online of mental health professionals describing the traits in more detail with examples, so it makes even more sense to me. If not BPD, then definitely some mixture or unspecific personality disorder.

It is not that I am fishing for another diagnosis, but having some sort of idea of what is going on helps me make sense of it all.

I'll certainly take the advice regarding professionals, because I have noticed professionals talking about not all practitioners (psychologists, psychiatrists etc.) completely understanding the disorder and actually do not want to treat patients with BPD. I just do not know where exactly to find someone who would be able to give a proper second opinion on the matter (even if they do still say that that is not what we are dealing with).