This is really helpful. I like several of these. Thanks for sharing.

How are you feeling now? What time is your appointment with your therapist? I am hoping she can help. I think it is perfectly fine to let her know that you intend to manage this on your own without going to IP. You can give her examples of how you've been able to pull yourself out of it enough to do the right thing. Texting the crisis line last night is a perfect example. I do think you should be completely honest with her though and let her manage her own interpretations. That's what you're paying her for. I know you're worried she will misinterpret, but I think it is also possible that she will interpret correctly and simply offer something you don't want to hear. You cannot receive her best if you edit your truth to avoid that.

I also hope she can help you find a new doctor. It is a total shame your other doctor has been so non-responsive. You've been battling with one issue for another for far too long and he had multiple opportunities to do the right thing. Hang in there Bluebicycle. I think you're incredibly strong.