Hello. I am new here. I thought it might help me to talk about my situation. I am currently in therapy and am considering a support group.

My soulmate, John, died at age 57 on April 14. I never got to say goodbye and thank for being the best thing that ever happened to me, tell how much I will always love him. I still say, "I love you" out loud, hoping somewhere out there he can hear me. Sadly, when anything goes right or wrong, my first impulse is to imagine telling John. Then I realize I cannot.

I still have crying spells. I feel sometimes as if, now that he is gone, I am just passing time, waiting to die. I am a very hard person to get to know, so I know I will never experience the same closeness with anyone again.

A few people were supportive at first, but they have subtly suggested I should move on. Perhaps they are right. But I think more people need to realize that when you lose someone you love, you do not just need support for a week and then return to normal life. Grief is long and hard.