Hi Angel --

Of course we all have blind spots. So that's one way that we don't know ourselves as well as we might like.

It can also be hard to predict how our behaviors may affect someone else -- and that can bounce back to slap us on the arse.

There is a 3rd explanation for the remarks of people who tell us new ways that we are bad, inadequate, etc.

Often we with low self-esteem have been trying very hard to please others. When we finally speak up for ourselves, take care of ourselves, set a boundary -- we inconvenience those who have gotten used to taking advantage of us. Then we are accused of being selfish, mean, etc. It's really their problem, not ours though.