I am TRULY, DEEPLY SORRY that you're HURTING AND STRUGGLING SO BADLY and that you're GOING THROUGH ALL OF THIS, @fluffynomore! I TRULY, DEEPLY AM! I am sorry that you see yourself in that light. I don't know what you've done specifically, but personally, I think there's hope for EVERYONE so please take this chance to redeem yourself from your bad deems. The past is the past but you can STILL write your OWN Future. A better one! I'd suggest to seek some help and the RIGHT treatment for yourself if you wish! As for the rest, I too want to give you a warm welcome to this WONDERFUL Forum along with BOTH THE WISE AND WONDERFUL @Skeezyks and @Fuzzybear! WELCOME ABOARD! Feel free to PM me ANYTIME when you need someone to talk to or vent to or even simply some advice and support! I'LL TRY TO GET BACK AT YOU AS SOON AS I POSSIBLY CAN! THAT'S A PROMISE! YOU CAN REST ASSURED OF THAT! I am SURE plenty of others will also GLADLY, WISELY, BEAUTIFULLY, KINDLY AND WISELY help you out as well! I AM SURE OF THAT! THAT'S A PROMISE! YOU CAN REST ASSURED OF THAT! Sending Many Safe, Warm Hugs To BOTH You, @fluffynomore, Your Family, Your Friends, Your Doctors, Your Therapists, ALL The People You Love And Accept For WHO THEY TRULY ARE Who ALSO Love You And Accept You For WHO YOU TRULY ARE As Well! Keep fighting and keep rocking! I am TRULY, DEEPLY SORRY that you're GOING THROUGH ALL OF THIS and that you're HURTING AND STRUGGLING SO BADLY! I TRULY, DEEPLY AM! KEEP FIGHTING AND KEEP ROCKING! PLEASE NEVER GIVE UP HOPE NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS!