lonelyinmyheart i just wanted to say that what you wrote really resonates deeply for me and it is a comfort to me as well to know that I'm not the only one who feels all of this. i am working through it, slowly, and am starting to see the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel, but at one time or another i have felt all of what you said so eloquently.... the struggle with wanting to be near t, missing her so much it physically hurts, wanting her to fill the abyss within, something about t that I can't find in anyone else... all of it. you said it all SO well. Thank you.