I had lots of scary dreams last night. I won’t even say the first one because it could be very triggering but it was awful. Then the second one somehow I was in Harry Potter and had to kill all the horcruxes. But I was being chased by dark wizards trying to stop me. I had to be very violent with one because she pinned me down and was about to stab me. It was terrifying. Awful, just awful.

I’m feeling down today but dragged myself out with my son to get a nice breakfast. RS is working today and tomorrow. Tomorrow my son and I are going to go to my grandparents house so I don’t have to be alone. I’m embarrassed to tell her how much I’m struggling. But I have to be honest. I’m not going to go into too much detail, just let her know. Because if I choose to go back to my old job I will have to tell her so I might as well let her know now. Besides my grandma has always supported me. She’s more like my mom than my grandma. She stepped up when my mom was too depressed to take care of us. She’s truly my rock.

I’m trying to watch my carbs to see if it makes a difference in my diabetes symptoms. I can’t get checked out until November. I failed the last two days. It’s very hard to go low carb for me. It means I have to cook a lot more, which I should do anyway because it’s less money spent out. I really want to make a nice Sunday dinner tomorrow but it’s still too hot to use the oven. It’s going to be 90 degrees on Wednesday! But by Friday it’s only going to be in the sixties. So cooler weather is around the corner. Next Sunday I’ll be able to make something good if I’m feeling ok.

We are under a boil water advisory yet again. The water company that supplies our water is a mess. They’ve had numerous investigations and administration changes and still can’t get their act together. Because of it, we only drink bottled water anyway. So we’re already stocked up. I’m glad I have a dishwasher, that way I can still wash the dishes without using bleach!