thank you bb... i am really missing my family... and it's hard because as a parent you want them to grow up and be successful... but i raised them by myself ... and with them gone i am by myself... i only have brothers and sons... and they think very differently then women do... so they don't get it... i haven't seen my grandbabies since november and things there are really a mess... if i knew they were safe it would be one thing ... but i don't know that... and that is really scary... i have isolated myself to the place of only having one irl friend... and i kind of like it like that...but... it's the pits too... i know none of this makes any sense.. and finacially things are crashing around me and i can't pretend they arent there anymore... so things are a mess... sorry for dumping on you...lyn