Quote:
Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25
RS and my son and I went on a mini road trip to the shore last night for our favorite bbq place. It was very good. I had shredded bbq chicken with no bun and about half my tater tots, keeping the carbs down. It was nice driving for awhile with the windows down, listening to music and holding RS’s hand. It really lifted my mood for awhile. I am back to feeling ****** this morning after having nightmares about work but I am going to see my grandparents today insteAd of moping at home so that’s good. I hope I feel better after that.
I am so sick with anxiet about going back on Tuesday. I hope I calm down. I don’t want to show up a huge mess. I wish I could make this work. The money is good. But I don’t think money is worth sacrificing my mental health.
I still want to hurt myself. I promised RS I wouldn’t though. If I do I know it’ll be bad enough to need medical attention and then I will be hospitalized. That’s no good.
I still need to focus on doing what my T Told me to do. It’s very hard. I didn’t do so well with it last week. I’m going to try my hardest this week.
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I am sorry you are still going through so much.
I am wondering if you have tried taking some time before going to sleep at night to tell yourself a very different version of a dream you would rather encounter (than the unpleasant nightmares)?
I don't recall if you this has been mentioned to you before?
I would write out the drearm if I had the time to do so.
I have read some people have had great luck in re-writing their dreams in this way.
I hope you will continue to refrain from harming yourself. I know you can do it!!! Do you use any substitute behaviors in place of harming yourself?
Keep on taking all of this one step at a time. I know it is very challenging for you. I have watched you overcome a lot. I fully believe you can continue creating victories for yourself and for your family.
I believe in YOU!
