I feel lost due to the lack of a relationship. I got dumped by my most recent ex last christmas. Like I am 217lbs, I'm trying to quit smoking and I've been on a pescatarian diet for a week now trying to fix my weight. Aside from my weight and smoking I feel that my mental issues are a big hindrance when it comes to finding a relationship. I'm avoiding bars cause they're mostly seedy in my area and I've never liked clubbing. And bars used to be my go to places for hooking up prior to developing schizoaffective disorder.

Basically going by how gross I look naked plus my serious mental issues I wouldnt even date me so I cant complain too much. All I'm doing is trying to look good so that I can fit comfortably in a casket cause right now it looks like I'm going to die alone.