(((((( childofchaos ))))))

May LOVE surround you, comfort you, lift you up!!!

I have had a similar night. Terrorizing, in fact. I have spent the day searching for the Light. It is lonely to feel lost in the dark. We are here for you.

Is there anyone you can reach out to IRL?

What happens if/when you talk?

I know that I withdraw sometimes, when I truly need to talk the most. During those times, I find that if I allow myself to talk, I also feel my feelings. Sometimes, especially after a night of nightmares, for instance, my feelings tend to frighten me. If I feel too threatened/frightened of my feelings or memories, I might then dissociate.

I try to intervene in my pattern by allowing myself to talk even though I really, really, really do not want to talk.

This is how it can go for me.

Just wondering how it goes for you?
Does talking open doors you wish would remain closed?

Don't feel like you must respond here. I am just trying to share with you and I do realize you may not feel like talking for reasons beyond our ability to fully comprehend. I don't want to encourage you to drop any defense system that is serving you well today.

Just trying to tell you that you are not alone.
We are here for you.