I would like to wake up not consumed by anxiety and thoughts of self harm. That would be nice.

Lots of nightmares last night. Not my usual self harm and abandonment nightmares. Nightmares about being hurt and no one wanted to help me even though I was screaming for help. There were people right there but they were ignoring my screams. Then I had one about my husband. He was angry with me for being upset and we were fighting. I just kept thinking “I want to get back to RS”. RS isn’t angry with me for being upset.

I’m sorry I’m complaining so much. I should be more positive. I know many of you have it much worse right now.