Welcome to the forum angel.

Many people have experienced the secrecy of SI and some of the emotions it brings such as shame and fear of rejection. It is a coping skill and it can work. Unfortunately it is not one of the best to use. Maybe you can start to explore other skills when you are feeling stressed and start to replace the cutting with them?

Please get medical attention if you need to. I don't know if it is an option but many times it is beneficial to find someone to talk to about your stress such as a t or counselor. You may want to consider that. Also if it helps please keep posting here.

BB