There is only one solution to all this: don’t date wrong men. It’s usually obvious after few dates if a man is really seriously into you and if he is a good partner. No need to go beyond few dates.

I think you have a misconception that nice women finish last. It’s incorrect. Ton of nice women are in happy healthy relationships. You can be nice and happy. But you have to respect yourself. No need to waste time on these type of guys.

Also you can’t change people. This dude is who he is plus he isn’t very interested. So dump him and don’t look back.

You deserve better

I have to add that none of it is easy especially when you are very young, which I suspect you are?. When I was young I wasted time dating wrong guys too. As I got older I realized that’s it is a total waste of time dating anyone who isn’t 100% great match. Longer you hang out with wrong men, less chance you have to meet right ones because you are not available to meet nice guys