I think you have some really good ideas (in terms of adoption forum)). it may be worth posting in the feedback section and asking for people's thoughts about that

I am sorry you feel like a failure as a mother. I'm sure you're not. I'm sure your daughter has a great life, and a happy life, and if the time comes when she chooses to meet with you, then that will be wonderful, and if not, well.... these things can be confusing.

I watch a show in england called long lost family (about people searching for their birth parents), some of those stories involve adoption, and a lot of those stories are sad- the parents feel terrible for giving them up.

you shouldn't feel like that. you gave her up because you didn't really have a choice. it's diffrent than say, giving her up because you don't want to be a mom