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Originally Posted by pandabear0927
It’s kinda all of the above:/... i honestly could go the rest of my life without it.. and to i guess the “average” person that sounds insane.. idk I don’t really have that attraction? Is that weird to say.. I never have:/ not to partners.. not to even a celebrity... not to a stranger on the street... idk i can say someone IS attractive/goodlooking but I don’t FEEL aroused if that makes sense. Not sure if that can be checked through bloodwork? Or if some people can just be actually Asexual... but any physical and tests I’ve got done all come back normal... it’s just that i know it isn’t.. it’s perfectly fine with me.. but i also dont want to end up alone because i dont connect with someone physically like that... so i give into my partner:/... idk it’s easy to feel out of place in a world where sex is a big part of culture.. it sells products, it’s in every other song on the radio.. it’s how many people fall in love in the first place and I’m hust kinda like eh whatever..
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You sound just like me a few years ago! You're not defective and the chances of something being medically wrong with you are very low. Some people are asexual. Some people are aromatic as well, which means that you just don't have romantic feelings for people. You can be both, just one, or neither. It's really okay. Asexuality isn't something that can be checked for bloodwork or any doctor, just like you can't medically test for heterosexuality, bisexuality, homosexuality, or aromanticism.
A lot of times, people associate sex and relationships and love as all being wrapped up into one, and that's completely okay. But... not everyone is wired like that. Romantic love can exist without sex coming into the picture at all, just like sex between two people can exist without love. But.. it is tough living in a sex-centric society when you're asexual. I totally get it. I'm asexual. It took a long time for me to accept that, but I am, and there's nothing unnatural or wrong about it, just like any other sexual orientation. It's completely normal, and I'm kind of happy to be this way.
There are so, so many ways to have a relationship, and my bets are that you won't end up being alone in the end after all. My best advice is to have an honest heart to heart with your partner to work this out. It might end things, it might not. That's up to you guys. Some asexuals engage in sexual activity with their partners, and some don't. Whatever feels best for you is valid. Maybe you can look into asexuality resources online and read more on the topic? There's also plenty of forums, online groups, etc dedicated to asexuality. I think you'll find that not only is there an expansive asexual community, but we come in all kinds of different flavors.
You're absolutely not alone in this, and you're welcome to PM me too
