And sometimes the supposedly `little things' add up. A child who already feels highly valued and loved and cared for can cope with a little gentle teasing against that background. A child who feels insecure with their place in the world can experience a little gentle teasing as a major insult. I was like that. It wasn't so much what my parents did (acts of commission) but what they didn't do (acts of ommission). If I was feeling scared or insecure they either didn't notice, or they would engage in gentle teasing. Which resulted in my feeling psychotically insecure.

Some people are more emotionally sensitive than others. There is stuff by Alan Schore (in particular) on emotional connections in infants... And emotional disconnections... Seems like such a little thing... But those disconnections can add up. Bet you can't find me someone who didn't experience disconnections in their life... But that being said... Some people experience enough of that emotional connection such that they develop that basic security... Though the majority... Do not.