T, I'm still thinking over how you said to bring in the topic of my first therapists. I oddly feel compelled to defend him right now. I doubted my own memory some days ago so I went back to my private journal and my memories were right. I even had posts on facebook during that time period where online friends told me his behaviour wasn't ok. Yet I feel very pulled to blame myself, pathologise myself because he had over 20 years of experience by the time I saw him...