I am so very sorry for your losses. Two at one time is just too, too much. Do you have a therapist by any chance? If so, maybe make an appointment and see if you can get some help from him or her.

Life is too short. It ends like that. And then we have to deal with it. So hard. Take care of yourself. Try to reach out, like you did here. Try not to isolate too much. Sending you positive vibes and prayers.