@LundiHvalursson

I don't know much about being a heterosexual male, being a male virgin at near-30, or having ASD, but I do know that many people with mental illnesses and/or other issues can find meaningful romantic relationships. There are also people who choose to be virgins until marriage or until forming a serious relationship w/ or w/o marriage. It takes effort in looking for a mate, depending on what you are looking for. If you're looking for long-term relationships, short-term relationships, playing the field, etc., you can find help with seeking potential female partners.

There shouldn't be an age limit on when not to be a virgin, so I wouldn't rush into it if you really want "the right one."

You can choose to be asexual, but if you're choosing it as a way to give up, or because you're struggling with trying and feeling rejected, then I'd say to not give up. Many heterosexual women (especially the single ones) are working on their education or on the start of their careers at your age, in their late 20s/early 30s. They may not be focused on relationships at this point. The others might have different preferences, or might already be taken, but that doesn't mean that you cannot find some dates in the meantime, and to see where it leads. Sometimes therapy helps with stuff like this, and sometimes there are "dating coaches" to aid with this. Sometimes the "late bloomers" win the prize during their mid 30s or early 40s, when people want to settle down and find a mate.

As a woman with acne and crooked teeth plus PTSD, among other things, I had a really tough time finding relationships. Dates, yes, but relationships, not so much. The relationships I got into weren't that great. I'm not sure if men struggle with similar things, but I can see your issues might be different. There are happy couples, or even those who are happily playing the field, who come in all shapes, sizes, and appearances. I met some men who matched your description whom I thought were cute and very smart, when I was around your age. I was single at the time and decided not to date since I was dealing with PTSD as well as some diseases I would rather not spread. Sounds gross, but I thought you should be aware that some of the "available" women aren't available in reality. Some might be looking for same-sex partners, some might only be looking for friendships, some might be looking for mates with certain looks or bank accounts, etc. I knew some (shallow) women who only dated rich men. To each his/her own, but that shouldn't speak negatively about you.

I'm 45 and asexual, and that is my choice. I chose this due to my disabilities. If it is a path you want to choose, it can still be rewarding with friendships and exploring all the things you like to do. Although I do isolate myself (due to my disabilities), I try to engage with friends or neighbors when I have the energy. I may be dealing with a lot of grief and loss, but I do what I can to feel good about who I am regardless of all my disabilities or acne scars or weight issues.

I'm sure you are a healthy young man who has his whole life to find a mate, or who can find dates if you're not interested in settling down. If you want to take a break, you can do so in a healthy way that doesn't involve isolation. Sometimes, when that happens, a date will actually appear and a woman will ask you out; it's weird; it's like your confidence increases when you're not looking, and people are, in fact, attracted to confidence (both in women and men, both for heterosexuals and non-heterosexuals). You cannot find a date/mate without looking, and you certainly cannot wait for a woman to magically appear and ask you out. That may happen, but it is rare. You can try dating services, or, you can try starting out with making friends only at meet-ins and meet-up groups (in real life), and then when you find women whom you've made friends with at events where you share common interests, then you've already built up enough rapport with new friends as well as potential dates. You can ask other men for some tips, and sometimes even ask other women for some tips as well. In the interim, you may find some woman that you're attracted to and actually friendly with to date. You will most likely already know her. Many women would rather wait to get to know some potential mates/dates in a friendship circle before dating, so as to build trust beforehand. Alternatively, there's always the dating sites for fast-paced blind dating.

Don't take your status to heart. You're a very eligible bachelor! You don't need to give up, unless you want to. It sounds like you really want to find a mate/date though. Hang in there.