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Originally Posted by LilyMop
My only reason for suggesting that you generally refrain from speaking up on someone else’s behalf is that I know you’re working on making different choices for yourself.
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Yeah, I am trying to learn to have better self-control. It doesn't really bother me if I overstep someone's boundaries, for whatever reason, but it does bother me if I do so unintentionally. Especially if I ever want to have a romantic relationship, I need to know these things lest it become abusive. Which is a lot easier when it's a normal relationship with clear boundaries. But how does one navigate a relationship that's already abusive?
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Whether a person intends good or bad seems irrelevant when the outcome is essentially going to be exactly the same.
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I'm inclined to agree, although TishaBuv made a good point that, if one's intentions are not so great, it's usually going to show through eventually. I have trouble hiding my amusement during a heated argument. Sometimes I don't even bother trying.
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Originally Posted by TishaBuv
I feel like emotions are usually short lived, too... even those warm fuzzies of love. Sure, there’s a mostly baseline calm, normal. Then the joy is only for moments as is the despair. I’m sorry to hear you don’t feel love.  Has this always been the case for you, even as a small child?
As for the friends and fighting, it’s all pretty harmless unless it turns really toxic and violent.
Maybe you’d make a great lawyer!  |
I think so. I've always thought this was normal, and it was only after lengthy discussions with and observations of others did I realize that I was missing something. Apparently, other people weren't simply going through the motions when, for example, embracing a loved one in a hug; they were having a connection. The hug meant something to both of them. Of course, a hug doesn't always have some deep meaning. But for me, it never does.
And honestly, when I get the impression that someone is trying to have a connection with me, it kinda weirds me out and I don't know how to handle it.
I'm getting better at that, though.
I would love to be a lawyer, but I can't afford the schooling right now.