The word transference sounds pretty minimalizing but in reality it's something everyone does, in therapy and out. It's basically using our past experiences of people to form assumptions about present ones. It can be enormously helpful for psychological survival but also be harmful if it keeps you from seeing things as they are now.. My T actually doesn't use the word at all as she sees our relationship in the room as something taking place between the two of us in the moment and that it has reality in the now. She thinks it's natural that it will create strong feelings due to the emotional intimacy of the therapeutic relationship. Of course there will be feelings from my past because I have a lot of unmet needs that are coming out onto her due to the feelings of nurture etc I get from her, but it's also a real connection (when I can feel it) because I see her personality as she is today and I connect with that. All that said, I know I need to talk to her about what I'm feeling from the past as they are causing problems with the connection but it's very tough.