While I do think their is a genetic component to addiction, I also think we become addicted to substances because we need to numb our feelings for some reason. It could be past trauma, anxiety (IMO some people are anxious from a very young age--others develop it because of their environment--anxiety can get severe enough to cause problems in many areas of our life) or another tendency or current problem that has become too overwhelming for you. Some of us have painful thoughts that we have to learn to acknowledge, accept, and then develop better habits to cope and better thinking patterns. So I agree with Bizi that finding a therapist who can help you figure out what issues you are numbing, rather than acknowledging and facing is an important part of overcoming an addiction. That you realize you have a problem is a good step. It would also be good if you could talk about it with your spouse. If you can't, then beginning that conversation is also important for your marriage.