I’d not diagnose online but she does sound like my husbands ex/my stepkids mother.

She continued harassing us years after their divorce and she made adult kids’ life he$$. They are estranged from her, that bad it is

She was officially diagnosed with BPD but she refused therapy. Even after hospitalizations in psych hospital (she had some other issues besides BPD but refused to take meds)

Personally I don’t care what disorders, if any, one has. If relationship is bad, it’s bad. And I am out. I’d maybe stick around close family members who are not well. But not someone I am just dating, especially if they don’t even help themselves. I am not obligated to date or marry people who don’t enhance my life