You've known this man for a long time now. I can relate with you, in that even though there was not an official relationship, it felt like it could be, right? I'd say that if he is not willing to start a relationship---not to mention he is all ready committed---and the fact that the two of you don't meet very often, that you move on. Telling yourself different will only increase your depression. You cannot, however, deny your feelings. Bring out the anger and sorrow, cry---whatever it takes. Forgive, don't put it behind you; do not regret or resent. That will be a step in moving on. An answer to your question: no, I have not, but I can imagine the reasons why I would remain in a relationship even if I was depressed. I suppose it'd be reason enough that having a lover would, hopefully in the long run, make me feel happier or less empty. Someone to make me feel human, alive... "be a somebody." Knowing this though, is why I avoid intimate relationships. It'd be unfair to my partner and myself if there is no improvement in my mental status. I, too, suffer from depression. But I am looking for other means in curing me from this disorder. I hope that helps. You are welcomed to talk with me anytime. =)