TRIGGER WARNING -----------------------------------------

I tried to get some sleep and all I could think about was ending it. I don't know why I'm so upset over this. I just got out of bed and called my mom. I knew if I stayed in bed I might put my plan in action. She helped me feel better. She reminded me of how I'm important to my cats. And how one was rescued from near death and now she has me to love her. I almost started crying again. I guess I don't want to abandon her or my other cat. I just wish I had a solution to my problem.