I personally don't see anything untoward in what you posted. When I was in my forties, even before the birth of my first child, we had boys' night once every couple of months, at most. Granted, I was a bit of a career freak. Really, I just wanted to be with my wife. We had fun together.

In my experience, most American men who are responsible, career-motivated people have left the partying in the rearview mirror by age 40. Usually, at least as far as has been the case with the people I have known, a lot earlier than that. To me, the partying thing is more an early twenties, just-out-of-college thing. If you're not in some kind of grad school, that is. Which I was.

A solid BF/partner/fiance/husband would want to be with you. You would be the priority. And that would be plain and obvious. That's how it's supposed to work and that's been my experience. This needing to hang out with the guys all the time is just kind of weird to me. And saying he needs to change this and then not changing it is either a procrastination thing or a maturity thing, neither of which is very good at his age.

Just my 2 cents. I wish you all the best. I'm sure you will find what you are looking for. There are obviously lots of eligible men in NYC. Plenty of fish in that sea. Sending you positive vibes.