I'm sorry you are facing this. I went through a similar situation early this year. My father who I had not spoken to in 20 years had a stroke and spent 2 months dying. It was very hard to know what to do but ultimately my brother and I decided that we needed to go say goodbye. I am glad we did and that I had a chance to say things I really needed to say to him. For me that meant I told him that I forgave him, that I truly didn't understand the choices he had made and that I was sad for him. And I prayed for him. I think that part made him mad but too bad. He held my hand tightly the whole time (he had a tube down his throat and couldn't talk) and I'm glad my final memories are what they are.

People told me to be sure that I made decisions I could live with because I would never get another chance. For my sister and half-brother that choice was to maintain the broken relationship. For my brother it was to go into the room but really say nothing. For me it was to really offer my heart. I think each of us is glad we made the decision we made; it was right for us.

I hope you find peace. I think that is the best outcome from these situations even though it can mean so many different things and can be confusing and sad.