Tisha Buv, I want to second all the other posters here. I'm so sorry you are having to go through this with your own flesh and blood family. You do not deserve to talk to a brick wall and their backs. You deserve to talk to receptive people who care too. Who don't just blame you for everything. Maybe this is a LOSS that you are GRIEVING. Makes sense! I love that bpcyclist said to spend time with and focus on people who want to be with you too. I agree. You seem like a lovely person deserving of people who love you and care. I know that it hurts and it totally makes sense to me that this would come up for you around the holidays, Including all those "family" holiday movies. My advice to you, if you want it, would be to not contact them. But I also want you to know I get that it hurts. A lot. Letting go and grieving is a process. Sometimes a long one.

Take care of YOURSELF. Post on PC, find ways to boost your self esteem, and learn what brings meaning to your life. Whatever you choose we are here for you.