Some times, when either I am really stressed out or people around me are -- or if they are savages as some get- the lyrics "it's the most wonderful time of the year" comes into my head and sometimes I will hum or sing it.
Yes it's sarcasm, yea I have baggage, and it's ok to be me.

I am learning still, to NOT push myself to "suppose to" and do more "what I want" without shame or guilt, thats been WIP for years. No shame or guilt if just curled up with my cat.
I am learning I do not have to go sitting with "happy cheery " people when I am anxious or depressed, and slapping on yet another mask to make them feel better ((for work that is))..

I am switching up December this year, for my own Mental health reasons (back in therapy and not been 100%). I will see my dog friends in November though. ((House and pet sit for a family that goes out, always happy to do that because the dogs I do love and I hear the kids are happy the dogs are alreadyat home, but I need to self care this year)).

I am planning to go to the gardens this year to see the lights, as I didn't do anything this fall with festivities due to, well where the hell did the time go?

Depending on my mood I may get creative, or I may just let the days go by and do life. Time has been slowing down for me in my mind, so maybe I can plan a little if I have the energy and motivation to.

I rarely decorate.

I did already get two kids of my friend's family gifts, because I wanted to. I'm going to let their dad decide if gifts are for home or grandma's.

I do not plan to go to friend's family's dinner as I haven't for a while now (even when we were together I had stopped), I realize even subtle family disfunction and all that stuff, I'm very sensitive to and do not need to subjugate myself to it if I am not up to it. Yes avoidance but safe, and do my thing, and again no shame in knowing One's self enough.

I may apologizes for missing works lunch too, as I just have been having issues with dealing with facades lately... and they are there... but will see.

I will plan to either go out or make a small nice meal.

One day at a time. Dont beat myself up on expectations or what others do. I will probably get a poke here and there but it's ok, it's going to happen.
I know I will debate with myself on contacting my estranged brother, but If I do or don't, no regrets because in the moment I will have my reasons.
My sister I just simi reconnected within this year-I will text at least, but I don't expect an Invite.

Setting the bar low is always good on this topic for me, and also reminding myself- if I want to make cards make them, if i don't- then don't..
, making sure to not over indulge in the sambuca too helps me out, but some is ok if I am up for it .. no eggnog though 🤮