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Nov 09, 2019, 10:27 AM
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Member Since: Oct 2019
Location: You'll never know
Posts: 940
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I absolutely cannot do sleep apnea machines.
I have been diagnosed with mild sleep apnea. It took the help of a social worker at the VA to calm my nerves and fears about the sleep study. I slept maybe 2 hours tops because of my PTSD-related fears. I told them that I did NOT want any uniformed personnel around me at night, and absolutely no men around me. I was taken care of by a lady.
It took a while for the goup in my hair to wash out.
I received their CPAP machine and went through the fitting, but even then, I panicked. I felt like someone's hands were covering my mouth, and that's all I could see in my mind. I couldn't sleep that way; my sleep issues don't only involve sleep apnea or "sleep hygiene" issues. They involve PTSD-related insomnia! I cannot feel weighted down with weighted blankets, because then the intrusive thoughts come. The same occurs when I try the sleep apnea machine; the intrusive thoughts about a hand smothering me, shutting me up, holding me down, and forcing silence upon me overwhelm me to the point where I cannot relax let alone sleep.
Don't they get it?
There's gotta be a better machine for PTSD!
I wound up losing my CPAP machine during my move across states. It's not like I want another one issued to me anyway.
What other alternatives are there besides CPAP and CBT-i (for insomnia; sleep hygiene)? Is there a trauma-related sleep therapy (not just relaxation) that could help, for instance? Will I really die prematurely without the CPAP machine? --This last question infuriates me because it's not my fault that I have sleep apnea, and that my PTSD keeps me awake at night. 
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