That is really sweet of you, @MickeyCheeky! But regardless of me being nice person or not, I still have no friends. I have no idea what am I doing wrong, but obviously something is wrong. I always had trouble getting and keeping friends. Even when there were people I genuinely liked and considered friends, they obviously did not have same opinion. Everywhere I look they say "you have to love yourself", and "you should be comfortable and happy alone" and such... Do things, be busy, have hobbies... until when? I am getting old, I have hobbies, I have job, it's not that I don't love myself (in normal amount), still alone and always alone. Friends that I had just leave me with no regrets whatsoever, why? No one misses me, even little? I think I am too lonely, yes I have child but I am noticing same problems with her and it bothers me a lot. I am bad influence, really bad.

I don't know what else to do. I work out, love sport, I was a writer (failed), an illustrator, comic artist, I have a job, I don't have much free time, I tried therapy, medications, meditation, all of that. When I joined sport club (I now work out alone) I still did not got to know anyone. Still alone and it bothers me, bothers me a lot. Why I can't even get a date? Dating apps are just horrible, I even tried that, some men lied about their marriage status, and other dates were just boring without any spark from both sides. I gave up. I am tired. I am maybe too old to get friends, and don't even know where and how anymore.

I love your positive energy but it seems I am so much older than you. I used to be very positive up to several years ago. Then I started to slowly give up. Now as I am getting older and it really starts to show it freaks me out, really it's scary, and I am desperate to start to live, to love, to have friends, but nothing happens. It's not that I didn't try but nothing works. If I failed in any social contacts when I was 25 or 35 and much more happy and positive person than I am now, and wasn't even depressed at the time, how am I getting to meet anyone now?