|
It depends on what the conflict is, and how well my fight-flight-freeze operates.
At the lower end of conflict, I would either (a) walk away or (b) assert my boundaries, depending on the venue and/or the importance of the person.
In the middle-range of conflict, such as where I will be harmed emotionally, verbally, psychologically, reputation-wise, etc., I would (a) ignore (if it's not that serious and enough people know who I am, know my character, trust me, and stand by my side), (b) report (if necessary and allowed), or (c) fight fire with fire intelligently (nope, I will not give away my tricks, but I will say that strategic moves might be in order).
In the high range of imminent physical and/or sexual threat, I would be at the mercy of my disorder (PTSD, DID), so I may either (a) freeze/dissociate, (b) fight/possibly through dissociation and alter switching, or (c) flee/possibly through dissociation and alter switching. Dissociation/DID is involved in fight/flight/freeze, not just "freeze." Freeze is something I would typically do when under complete shock of the situation and still "me" (the host) at the forefront. Flee is something I would typically do when I have an outing and enough psychological hardiness, self-efficacy, and courage to do so. Fight, on the other hand, has gotten me into trouble, even though I was in self-defense mode; some cunning offenders will find a way to turn you into the bad guy, in which case, your defense is now seen as an offense; thus, I try to stay within the legal limits of fighting IFF (if and only if) I have witnesses and enough social capital to do so. Typically, offenders isolate you, corner you, clock/time you in order to prevent this from happening; thus, you have to be smarter than they are, prepared to move quickly, and a little paranoid/pessimistic/anxious in order to be alert enough to fight back and then escape, that is, if you don't freeze. Using self-defense tactics or "weapons of opportunity" help when you're in a legally defensive position, but it works best if you have a witness. Without a witness, the mentally ill person will be shredded on the stand or by local law enforcement taking the statement, so it is harder for anyone with a mental illness and otherwise to prove themselves as truly and legally defensive when fighting back. This is what keeps us silent, especially women, whose gender roles are treated more punitively in both a court of law and by law enforcement; women who fight back or show any aggression will receive harsher punishments - often punishments they don't deserve in the first place - than men who defend themselves; sometimes legal defenses are not seen as "legal." Unfortunately, this happens when there's domestic violence conflict.
So, it depends. If you have a choice between fight/flight/freeze, choose the best one that legally works. If you have PTSD, however, it's not always a choice, and the treatments to reduce hypervigilance may endanger those who lack the awareness required for dangerous living or working situations. In combat situations, you have to remain vigilant and at the ready to fight; retreating is only an option when it is a strategic move prior to engaging in the fight, or a direct order; freezing is not allowed unless you are at risk of being captured as POW or endangering your unit - some of many examples. In violent neighborhoods, the same applies, unfortunately. In domestic violence situations, it's complex and chaotic; fighting becomes less of an option. In general life situations, you do what you can to think quickly and strategically, but mental illness can get in the way.
|