Thanks, maybe I ought to do that. Writing it down is somewhat easier for me than talking about it (especially when anonymous). I think it's mostly a tone of voice thing where my tone is kind of flat and might send the signal that it affects me less than it does. That and I've been hesitant to disclose stuff like those violent thoughts because I don't want my therapist to think I'm violent (which I'm not, I've never hurt a fly except in my mind).