I went for a massage today. My first massage therapist is back in the studio, the one from a couple years ago who let me sob my way through my massages and just talked me through it: what my body was doing, releasing the trauma energy. She told me I look good, happy. I realized when I had today's massage (with my excellent "new" massage therapist) that I am so much more attuned to my body, where the energy is stored, the connections and tensions and where I need to let go.

AND...I didn't need my jaw massaged. I am constantly gritting my teeth during the day and while I sleep. My jaw is always sore and in need of massage. The ex moved out and apparently the jaw-clenching stopped. I didn't even notice, it just plain stopped without my realizing.

It still feels weird.
(Like...is this real? It is. But is it? Yes, it still is.)