It seems to me that you have tried very hard to both accommodate him and to find out why the holiday schedule has changed. And, it sounds like he has refused to acknowledge your feelings (valid), thank you for making the effort to understand, or respond in a useful way to your concerns. IF the rest of the year is good, I would suggest (instead of banging your head against this wall) that you, if you are able, do find a place(places) to go for the holiday season (a vacation plus seeing your family? away with a friend?)---be scarce and enjoy yourself. If there are other persistent issues, consider talking to a counselor even if he won't join you so that you can problem-solve for your own sake. ((((((((((((((((hug))))))))))))))) I know how painful that kind of stonewalling is.