Quote:
Originally Posted by ElectricManatee
NP, this sounds messy and complicated in ways that only the therapeutic relationship can manage to be. I think your T could have handled this a little more smoothly, and I don't think you did anything wrong. Even if one or both of you needed a change, it sounds like the way it was unrolled was really disruptive and upsetting. I want to chime in that I think even a few sessions with a different trauma therapist could be helpful. My EMDR T has been really, really helpful in discussing the relationship I have with my main T, and it has released me from some of the shame and defectiveness I felt when a similar issue reared its head in my therapy. Hang in there. The way you feel right now isn't forever. 
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Agree with your post, but the bolded sentence particularly resonated with me. It's such a complicated relationship that can dredge up so many feelings. And it's not like with a friend where you can just be like, "Hey can we meet for coffee next week to talk this through?" Plus with a friend, you'd likely know if things were going on in their lives that could affect how they are acting toward you. And the balance of power is complicated as well in therapy, because you're paying the therapist, so in a way they're your employee, But then they make the rules.