Sending hugs to those suffering here. I do read your posts, but find it hard to respond. My concentration is a mess.

The weather has been perfect for swimming and walking but my stupid hip needs a rest so I have had to chill at home for the last four days. Hopefully by resting it properly I will be back to the beach soon. Exercise is my usual way of burning off stress. Instead I have been crying a lot. Yesterday I actually felt down and got worried I am becoming depressed. Only time will tell. This morning I am fragile still. PTSD is bad. The past haunts me through so many ways. I can't escape it. Instead I will walk through it. It f***ing hurts.

Monday morning here. This week I have hopes of getting some errands done, and being more social. On Wednesday I have therapy. That is going to be hard work, but helpful too. I do have moments where I am content in the midst of all this inner chaos. This helps me have hope. Sorry, I am a bit all over the place. I never really have anything good to write here. My life is so boring. Most of my time and energy still goes into surviving and recovering. This will change soon hopefully.