Agree totally with Bill3's comments.

Your are an adult with a husband and family, to whom you have responsibilities. You don't need her permission to go to the wedding, just do it and enjoy.

Can relate to everything you've said about your relationship. No consolation I know, but my mother is exactly the same. I'm supposed to be eternally grateful for the fact that she brought me and my brother up single handed for five years after my father died.

As I'm outspoken, we frequently "lock horns". If it's not my lack of children then it's hairstyle/clothes. Now emotionally blackmailing me over a family problem (see "my sister-in-law lashed out at me"). In past two years, have spent nights in hospital with her. Being awake for over 24 hours is no joke! She's totally forgotten about this and now blames me for everything my aunt says/does that she doesn't like.

Unfortunately, daughters are the ones who feel they have to look after mothers. Also putting up with their unacceptable behaviour appears to be part of the job description. Sounds like your husband is very tolerant, hope he remains that way.