I can completely understand how you are feeling & I for myself, I can say, that "this too shall pass".

When I got the certified letter from the IRS & found out all the back taxes that were owed that my husband had kept secret from me & then not done anything to handle the situation himself.......I was devistated. On top of that, he wasn't getting all the information together that was necessary to get the refi going on the house in California. For some reason unbeknowns to me, he hadn't been functioning for many years now, but never communicates so I had no idea of what was going on until it dumped on me all at once.

I would wake up mornings, completely frozen. I couldn't function. I would pull the covers over my head & wait until 3 or 4 in the afternoon (or later) to poke my head out & check if I was still alive or if I was just living this horrible dream.

I would get up & take a hot shower........where I would pray for help to know what to do & how to handle the situation. Somehow, each day, I would get a little piece of the puzzle put together & was able to communicate with the IRS who helped me completely (without the need for an tax lawyer). I was able to get all the paperwork necessary from our creditors & also negotiate lower amounts for payoff. I would also spend time on the bible study I am involved in & started poking my nose out into my new community & meeting people & getting involved in my church group, & in the community horse groups.

I know for me, there were days at a time when all I could do was to take that hot shower & use that time to pray for the help I needed & then fall back onto my air mattress on the floor of my new farm house which has absolutely no furniture because I have to repaint the whole interior of the house which the painter so badly messed up.

I can't take meds.....then make things worse than not taking them because of all the horrible reactions I have......so I am on my own with my OMEGA-3 & a low dose of seroquel that helps me sleep when my mind would allow me to........but I know that as I chipped away at all the pieces & started getting everything completed, I found such a relief, I was amazed at what a fresh feeling I was able to experience......I started to function again without the load of stressors hanging over my head. I still have many issues to deal with, but at least now I am functioning again.......I was able to do it without meds.....but I have to admit.....it did take a lot of hot showers & a lot of prayer.....

But the inability to function passed & I was able to become a real human again.

Give yourself the time you need & let accept the lack of functioning without fighting it.....for me, that seems to make things worse than better.......& you will look back at the time & realize it wasn't that long afterall that you weren't functioning....it just seems like forever when we are in the middle of it.

hugz,
Debbie