I think I have been aware I do this for some time but this year I have decided to curb it.

It happens a bit at birthdays but mostly it's Christmas where I really go over the top.

Every year I seem to buy more and more for people, I like buying gifts, and picking out special things for people I care about which sounds quite innocuous when I write it down but really I have come to think it's not all that healthy.

At its root I think I falsely believe that the more I give the more people will understand how much I care for them. This is tied in with a feeling that no matter how long I live or what I do I can never express how much I care or love those near to me.

When my son was little we used to love getting him gifts and the whole excitement of the season- I guess that's pretty standard. But he is grown now and earns more than me! This year we mutually agreed to rein it in and set a modest limit - it's right but I still feel a bit weird about it, like I am sad about those days being over.

So I came to realise this gift giving is really an emotional need in me.

This year I am pleased my friends suggested charitable donations instead. It's a good place to start.

I am hoping I will be able to stick to the limits.

Anyone else identify with this pattern?