Hey there u people across the Atlantic,

I just strarted a program which I fought for the last 6 Months,
During this time I had parts of times when I couldn´t even get out of bed depressed and this fog of anxiousness around me.
This program is a outpatient program also including the half day of Saturday. I have a good feeling about the place. But to get there it takes me an hour, one way, by train. And this train is packed, it feels as if all my energy gets sucked out of me.

It is like a metaphor for society, kinda survival of the fittest.

So yesterday I couldn´t go, cause I was freaking out, just by the thought on that trainride and these many people.

In the good times I don´t care at all, it just doesn´t bother me one bit.
I really don´t want to freak up this opportunity cause of a packed train in the early morning.

Well anxiety on top of the depression really, really suxxxxxx.
Good night and u guys and gals have a nice evening