Lately I feel like I mean nothing, my life means nothing. My mom's gone. My father was never around and lives near me but doesn't give a **** if I'm alive or dead and never did. I feel like I'm a charity case to my sister and I'm just using up resources in life. I feel tired of keeping up this charade of life. I'm just alone in this world, a screw up that never will get anywhere, and I don't even know if God exists anymore, I don't feel connected to him or like he cares anymore. My cats are my reason for being alive right now.