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Old Nov 22, 2019, 05:25 PM
fern46 fern46 is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Mar 2019
Location: USA
Posts: 3,021
Quote:
Originally Posted by bluebicycle View Post
Well, my therapy appointment turned into a huge, long rant about my sister, so I kinda feel like I wasted my appointment slot when I could have talked about other, more pressing things, but I also kinda feel like I needed to "let it out" to someone.

Long story short, I told my therapist about how my sister is VERY manipulative, VERY entitled, VERY controlling, and VERY uncompromising with everything (because everything has to be "her" way and ONLY her way). She basically does this fake crying thing when she doesn't get her way, and then says how everything is "unfair" to her when she has to compromise... because she is manipulative and wants to play victim. And then she uses my mom's' credit cards to buy whatever she wants because she doesn't want to spend her own money on things, even though she has money in the bank. Then she has the audacity to b_tch at me for how I spend my own money, even though I rarely buy things. So, I told my therapist that my mom is enabling her by giving in to what she wants and letting her use the credit card w/ no consequences. I said I wouldn't be surprised if my sister went bankrupt shortly after graduating from college, and that I will NOT be lending her any money when that happens.

Also, my sister is the kinda person who b_tches about free stuff. Like if she gets a Christmas gift that she doesn't want, she'll b_tch about it. For example, she'll SAY she wants a very specific thing for Christmas and we get it for her as a surprise, and then when it "goes out of fashion" (according to her...), she acts like she never wanted it, saying, "Ewwwwww. Why did you get this for me? I never said I wanted it." (Yes, she says "ewwwww.") She'll also return all her gifts and demand us to give her the cash instead (since the money goes back onto our credit cards after she returns the items). And she doesn't ask for cheap gifts, either. They're typically REALLY expensive. And of course, after we get her like a $400 gift, she'll give all of us like a candy cane and a gift worth $5.... specifically, a gift bought USING MY MOM'S MONEY, not even hers!! I know she doesn't have to give a gift if she doesn't want, but it's pretty insulting to spend lots of money on her and then she pretends she doesn't like it and then demands money. I hope I don't sound entitled or having high standards, but she knows we're giving her expensive stuff, so I don't see why she can't at least partially reciprocate by spending more than a measly $5 and doing more than just taking a free candy canes from work and giving them to us.
What would happen if this year you just bought her something thoughtful and inexpensive? She might complain, but at least you could save your money to invest in something that brings you greater joy. Also, what would happen if you explained to her how you view all of this? She doesn't seem very self aware. I don't know how you've held this in so far. In my family she would be called to the floor instantly for behavior like that. We're big on letting each other know when we are being an A hole. It keeps everybody in line

It stinks your parents enable this. You're so very different. I imagine they greatly appreciate what you offer to the family in terms of balance and contrast.
Hugs from:
bpcyclist, Sunflower123, Wild Coyote
Thanks for this!
Wild Coyote