Hi,

So my ex, who I think and she also thinks (even tho she does not want to get such a diagnose and she was long time in denial) that has several BPD symptoms, went to a psychologist and psychiatrist to get help.

Check here my description of her: She has Borderline? 1yr relationship, she has very interesting background!

The psychologist told her after she saw her for first time after around 15 min, that "rest assure, you don't have BPD".

The psychiatrist "examined" her for around 30 min, then told her she does not qualify for a full BPD diagnose, if not she would be affected in many life situations, but it is certainly that she has BPD traits/symptoms.

Back to her psychologist, she makes many sessions with her, telling and her only things like:

- everybody has those traits, it is nothing wrong with you
- I don't know DBT, you don't need that anyway, you just need more confidence in you
- we cannot do CBT because we don't have exact situation to work with


Basically, she saw her psychologist for around 3 months now, and they have not even started CBT or any kind of therapy!


Their sessions are only about my ex describing our relationship, and the psychologist reassuring her.


The psychologist thinks about all the situations that my ex inflicted to me ("dramas", "silent treatment", telling me several times we should dump each other for no reason etc) that is not good, but "I am too sensible".

My ex is now in a little crazy behavior, insisting to come to my country (we live in different countries now) to see me even tho I told her very clearly that we are no longer together and I don't want this. She always responds that she will come any way!

The psychologist tells her that yes she should come!

Even tho I am not at all ok with this. Incredible...


What are you your thoughts about the professionalism of the psychologist?


My ex is in a self acknowledging of her several BPD traits (emotional instability, empty feeling, idealization/devaluation, unstable relationships etc) and she seems willing to improve, but the psy I have the feeling she does not help her at all... even more, encouraging her unstable behavior or not wanting her to actually improve...

I think it's one answer to this situation regarding the psy:
1) She does not have any competence regarding Bpd or psychology in general

2) She has competence but thinks Bpd cannot be cured/improved, thus she prefers not to try therapies for such
3) She acknowledge my ex has several issues, but prefers just to be "OK" with everything she says just to keep her as a client and take her money (while forcing her to improve is risky as my ex could dump the sessions)