My Support Forums - View Single Post

TunedOut · 06:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lilly2

In anthropology terms, I'd say that the phrase you mentioned in the title rings true, that "when outraged, people take action." There are many instances in time and space where outraged groups fought back against those whom they believed to have harmed them. It's a survival instinct. I'm not sure on what the specific terms are, but there are other social science branches that have objectively looked at this phenomenon.

In peace studies, for example, there are two kinds of action:

1. Violent action (think Nelson Mandela)

2. Non-violent action (think Martin Luther King, Jr.)

Both leaders were outraged at what was going on, and both leaders took action. Both leaders saw what was happening to minorities, and they decided to do something about it.

When individuals are outraged, they seek action in one of two ways, too:

1. Violent action (e.g., self-defense, defensive aggression, criminal aggression, unlawful aggression, seeking physical revenge, spreading libel or slander, spreading rumors, name-calling, yelling, etc.)

2. Non-violent action (e.g., communication, complaints, verbal boundaries, legal boundaries, lawsuits, leading or joining peaceful protests, ghosting, publicizing true victimizations, advocating, finding alternative options, calling the police, making a citizen's arrest)

Outrage is such a strong word and a strong feeling. It is generally experienced after cumulative abuses, cumulative traumas, cumulative (poly)victmization, and/or cumulative wrongs have been done against a person or a group of people. Thoughts that coincide with feeling outraged may include:

1. Enough is enough!

2. I cannot stand this happening to me (or people like me) anymore!

3. When is this going to stop?

Victim-blaming and/or victim-shaming occurs when systemic/structural violence gets blamed on individuals or groups of people, which sounds like this:

1. You don't have to pay attention to those words or actions; just ignore them.

2. You are too sensitive.

3. Well, the majority of people who fit your description (looks, personalities, cultural beliefs/practices, socioeconomic status) are <fill in negative here>.

4. How can you change your thoughts to reduce your reaction to what you're hearing? (this represents an inappropriate CBT approach when the issue is not nor should not be the responsibility of the victim; it should be the responsibility of the offender, or the widespread offenses that continue to occur; this is what "continuous traumatic stress" looks like; it's not past traumas or "little t's"; discrimination, bigotry, prejudice, stigma, microaggressions, hate speech, and hate crimes are all forms of trauma that attacks certain groups of people, including people categorized by their skin color, height, weight, disability, mental illness, personality type, age, SES, etc.)

Such are considered secondary traumas and therefore adds to the outrage they feel. This is why peacemaking circles, restorative justice, compromises, new protective laws, and our First Amendment (if not others as well) are in place. We can use our First Amendment rights to freely speak about the wrongs being done to us. We can use peacemaking or restorative justice circles to bring offenders and victims together for a productive chat. We can advocate for new protective laws and/or policies, so that minorities aren't being harmed by discrimination, harassment, bullying, unethical practices, hate crimes, etc.

Thus, I agree that when outraged, people will take action. What that action is depends on the situation and all who are involved.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lilly2

@Fuzzybear (((safe hugs)))

I'm so sorry that happened to you.

I, too, felt outraged at the years and money wasted on misdiagnoses and mistreatments. It hurts, and healing from that hurt is challenged when our pain gets undermined or dismissed altogether.

I hear your pain. I'm sorry what happened to you.

The actions I chose when feeling outraged from this were:
1. File complaints
2. Communicate my laments
3. Find support
4. Educate myself
5. Find alternative treatments
6. Self-care
7. Spread awareness
8. Advocate
9. Take notes
10. Do research
11. Find and list resources
12. Take time to grieve
13. Ask for help
14. Remove myself from toxic situations
15. Reaffirm the boundaries I want to have for myself and with others
16. Reassess my goals
17. Learn to adjust to the effects that all this pain has caused me by finding a new purpose
18. Healing through salutogenesis
19. Healing through posttraumatic growth
20. Healing through meaning-making and finding a workable narrative in my life - facts, past feelings, current feelings, feelings that I want to eventually have, old thoughts, new thoughts, growth charts, and more!

These are the steps that I take when I feel outraged, defeated, overwhelmed, helpless, misunderstood, stepped on, taken advantage of, hurt, harmed, abused, traumatized, etc.

I hope you are doing okay. I know you've been processing a lot of this stuff. It's okay to take a break from processing so that you can enjoy the fun stuff, too. The processing stuff can be "contained" until the next time we are ready to take it off the shelf and work on more processing. That's called "pacing and containing," which has helped me stay grounded and focused only on what I need to focus on in the moment. I can revisit the past anytime, and I can work toward my future at a pace that I feel is most comfortable and healthy for me. I can live and enjoy the present, and be in charge of my own life, no matter what others tell me. --These are the words I tell myself, and you can tell yourself good, positive words, too. You're doing so well with posting all these great threads here. I love your threads! I just hope you are doing some self-care for you, too.

You deserve happiness and all the good things in life. We all do.

I'm just glad that you take time to process these things with us on PC. It reminds me of some unresolved pain that I have, too. It's important that we be safe while processing these painful things, too. Self-care really helps.

(((safe hugs)))

Quote:

Originally Posted by TishaBuv

This other psychiatrist I went to specialized in substance abuse. I went in there being truthful that I had taken 2 Benadryl

He made me pee in a cup. Yes, I was truthful. Then after talking to me for 45 minutes, he bangs his fist on the desk, and sternly says I have major depressive disorder. He barked it at me like it was punishment! What a jerk! I never went back to him, either.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

I did feel hurt and angry, because they misjudged me and mislabelled me. And were not even civil. They were not even slightly caring or understanding. They were bullies.

I was also labelled an angry person when growing up in an abusive family. I think too that some anger is a sign of self esteem, rather than allowing an abuser to treat someone like a chew toy.

Good thread. I am sorry about people who have endured anger they didn't deserve.

Anger can come from so many places like compassion for others, projecting something from the past unconsciously, a tactic to maintain power/cause a fear reaction that renders the victim powerless (especially when the victim has had experiences that have conditioned them

), etc.. Of course compassionate anger and anger that enables you to stand up for your God given rights would be a positive type of anger. Sometimes powerful people are able to effectively overwhelm "righteous" anger.

It's not easy, especially for those with very little power. This is why bad actors like to isolate people and don't want the truth to be known. We can think it is us but it might be happening over and over again.

At times, I have responded to anger appropriately; other times, I have not. When we are angry or make someone else angry, it is important to understand what caused the anger. Are they angry that they were caught doing something that was wrong or abusive? Angry because they were unfairly taken advantage of? It can take time to sort out but should be examined and situations can be complex but emotions tell us something important about ourselves or others. I have ignored some of my emotions or not taken the appropriate action and the inaction wasn't so good either. It is so important to listen to and honor everyone's emotions.